Is This Me?

In high school and college, I rarely wore any makeup or did anything uch with my hair. Exceptions were usually special occasions, like dances. Now I wear make-up more often than not, and take time with my hair. I like it, but I don't like being higher maitence than I used to be. I guess we all change, though.

Part of the reason I started wearing make-up was the big bags I was getting under my eyes from not sleeping well. After getting cover-up, foundation just followed. Another part was switching to contacts after wearing glasses since second grade. I started wearing mascara after that. And then I saw a neat post on how to enhance curly hair, and I started doing that. And liked it. So yeah, my beauty routine has changed. It just happened, and I do like it. Others around me notice that I wear make-up, and ask why, or who am I trying to impress. Uh, because I want to, and nobody, I just felt like it. And those are the best reasons, I think. So maybe, I take longer to get ready, but it does make me feel good about myself, and I'm ok with a little extra care. I don't need it to feel good, it just helps.

What does your beauty routine look like, and how has changed recently?

Fear of Revolving Doors

This past year (from February to February) has been very confusing for me. I have chosen different directions over and over. Ok, let's try this way. Oh, nope, I'm gonna close that door again. Whoa, it opened itself again.  When I describe it to my friends, I say that the door is a revolving one, that keeps spinning on me. Maybe its one of those automated revolving doors.



What is amusing about all this is that I am afraid of actual revolving doors, ever since one threw me because my friend went through it super fast. So now my life has come to resemble something I am afraid of. Also, who likes not knowing where they're going. Not me! I only hope and pray that eventually the door stops spinning. Meanwhile, I'll just do the best to honor God where I'm at.

Beauty

Last night I was in kind of a funk. At one point, I found myself in front of a mirror, after using the restroom. I was washing my hands and looked up at the mirror and started to pick out all of the flaws I saw. My hair was falling out of its braid, I looked tired, my pores were huge from eyebrow plucking. But then I realized what I was doing, and stopped. I smiled at myself and imagined there was a Operation Beautiful note posted on that mirror. One that said something like "Smile, you are beautiful". It made a big difference in the way I saw myself, and in my mood.

It surprised me that I had even started to pick out my "flaws". I'm not usually hyper-critical about my appearance. I enjoy wearing make-up, doing my hair, and picking out a cute outfit, but I know that my self-worth does not even come close to relying on my appearance. I'll put the self-criticism down to the fact that I was a little over-tired, and in a funk. I am so glad I could remember the messages from Operation Beautiful's blog, and pull myself away from the self-critical, damaging thoughts. I think that site is a great reminder that all women, all people, need to be less self-critical.

I also like the movement Own Your Beauty, that challenges us to accept ourselves for who we are. It doesn't mean we can't be better, but it does mean we shouldn't allow ourselves to be our own harshest critics. These are great lessons to remember, and apply to other areas in our lives outside of physical appearance, like in fulfilling our responsibilities, our dreams. We must reach towards our dreams, fulfill our responsibilities, but we should not expect ourselves to do better than our very best, which I think sometimes we do. or at least I do.

(cheesing with my roommate freshman year)

How do you remember to be true to yourself and not be your own harshest critic?

Tagged!

So my fellow blogger, Michelle, just tagged me. I now get to share 15 interesting facts about myself with you.  Hmmm....

Fact 1:  I cannot keep a manicure nice for more than a day or two. I just can't.

Fact 2:  I love watching BYU football.

Fact 3: I make awesome chocolate chip cookies. I love baking.

Fact 4: I didn't get my driver's licence until I was 22.

Fact 5:  I am totally a cat person, but think dogs are pretty cool too.

Fact 6: I am really truly stubborn. Sometimes, I forget that, and don't act it. But I am.

Fact 7: I love to dance, even if its just in my bedroom.

Fact 8:  Sometimes, I am a real ditz, very true to my blonde hair.

Fact 9:  I have different modes I switch into- my efficency mode (when I take charge of a task or situation), my psychology brain (when I see or encounter interesting human behavior and all I learned in college kicks in), and then there's just me.

Fact 10:  I run cold. I don't like cold.

Fact 11: I had a foot surgery this past June to reduce a bunion; now I can wear the shoes I want to with wayyyy less pain than before.

Fact 12: Sometimes, I whine way too much

Fact 13: I love kids, and for the most part, they love me too.

Fact 14: I love crime dramas like Bones, NCIS, and Criminal Minds. Oh, and crime comedies too. Go Psych!

Fact 15:  I am jealous of my little sister because she will graduate with a guaranteed career, and I just have no clue what I am gonna do with the rest of my life.

Wow, that was a little hard, because I've already shared stuff about me in other posts. But it was fun. Hope you actually find these facts interesting.

And, Jordan, Amanda, Jen, Kari, and Cole, you're IT!

Hope Is

Hope is scary
Hope is hard
Hope is painful

I am learning to hope in the Lord,  but I am also hoping for specific things.  Things I want, and am trying to determine if they are what the Lord wants for me. The hope for these things, events, people, could not come to fruition, and that makes is scary to hope, hard to hope, painful to hope. That's why the core of my hope is in my Savior, and what he has planned for me. Why I pray to see if my hopes are aligned with His plans. But even if they are, I can't control anymore than my own actions, and neither will God. He may plan something, and influence us, guide us. But he can't guide us if we aren't seeking Him. So I hope for something, but know that it may not happen. And that is just terrifying.

 But I know that God will catch me if everything falls through, that his works are not frustrated when people exercise their free agency. He just adapts. And I can trust in that, hope in that. That makes hope beautiful and safe.

Hope is beautiful
Hope is safe

Five Fun Facts

Here are 5 fun facts about me:

1. I am totally and completely addicted to books. My friends even tested this last Friday, if there is a book lying around, I pick it up and read the back. I used to wish the security guards would keep me out of the library during finals.

2. I love music. I listen to it constantly.

3. I am a Gilmore Girls addict. I love that show with their fast wit and the mother-daughter relationship.

4. My dream job in life is to work with teenagers, to inspire them to be all they can be.

5. I have zero luck when it comes to electronics, I have killed countless phones, almost 3 iPods,  2 laptops...its bad. We call it my curse.

That's a little bit more about me, and how crazy I am. Feel free to share a fun fact or two about yourself in the comments. I would love to get to know any readers I have a little bit better.